Codependency and You

Codependency is a learned behavior that can be passed down from one generation to another. It is an emotional and behavioral condition that affects an individual’s ability to have a healthy, mutually satisfying relationship. It is also known as “relationship addiction” because people with codependency often form or maintain relationships that are one-sided, emotionally destructive and/or abusive. The codependency and you workshop is designed for males and females that would like to learn more about what codependency is and how it can impact your life. Couples are also encouraged to take part in this workshop so they can learn to work together in a healthy manner to avoid falling into the codependency trap. Codependency often affects a spouse, a parent, sibling, friend, or co-worker of a person afflicted with alcohol or drug dependence. Originally, codependent was a term used to describe partners in chemical dependency, persons living with, or in a relationship with an addicted person. Today, however, the term has broadened to describe any codependent person from any family that isn’t functioning to its full ability.

Codependents have low self-esteem and look for anything outside of themselves to make them feel better. They find it hard to “be themselves.” Some try to feel better through alcohol, drugs or nicotine and become addicted. Others may develop compulsive behaviors like workaholism, gambling, or indiscriminate sexual activity. Many try to take care of a person who is experiencing difficulty, but the caretaking becomes compulsive and defeating. Codependents often take on a martyr’s role and become “benefactors” to an individual in need. A wife may cover for her alcoholic husband; a mother may make excuses for a truant child; or a father may “pull some strings” to keep his child from suffering the consequences of delinquent behavior. The problem is that these repeated rescue attempts allow the needy individual to continue on a destructive course and to become even more dependent on the unhealthy caretaking of the “benefactor.” As this reliance increases, the codependent develops a sense of reward and satisfaction from “being needed.” When the caretaking becomes compulsive, the co-dependent feels choice-less and helpless in the relationship, but is unable to break away from the cycle of behavior that causes it. Codependents view themselves as victims and are attracted to that same weakness in their love and friendship relationships. This workshop is designed to educate and empower individuals that will one day be entering a relationship; and couples, so they can enjoy a happier and healthier life together by avoiding codependent actions and behaviors toward each other and their children.